Self-Lobotomy at Home (For Dummies)
or how I learned to stop worrying and love the Matrix
Take an awl or ice pick. Preferably not too rusty or dull. Around 5 or 6 inches in length.
Rinse awl or ice pick in lukewarm water. Wipe off excess moisture with a (relatively) clean cloth.
Insert awl or ice pick under left eyelid until you feel gelatinous resistance. It’s natural to experience a little squeamishness here. Start streaming Joe Rogan or Jordan Peterson or Alex Jones. It’ll help you move through it. Don’t be a wimp.
Wiggle ice pick back and forth like a windshield wiper.
Relax. Finally relax.
Make America Great Again and Again and Again and Again and...A Gain…1
Some Signals Amid The Noise
NSFW 18+ ADULTS ONLY etc etc.
Just a gentle reminder, dear hearts….we are not responsible for anyone else’s triggers or for explaining things to anyone or protecting everyone from all possible harm and discomfort. There will be spoilers, profanity, nudity, obscure references, conspiracy theories, magick secrets, trivia, a general assumption of intelligence and general knowledge on part of the reader (and sometimes even the author), and plenty of bad jokes, puns and bawdy limericks in this and all future signals. Caveat Lector.
There once was a Captain named Kirk
who had quite a curious quirk
with gals white, black or green,
he could get quite obscene
in fact, he was kind of a jerk.
***
There once was a Vulcan named Spock…2
This Just In….
Michael Laris, (c) 2023, The Washington Post
Mon, March 6, 2023 at 8:12 PM EST
A former White House and international development official was killed last week after the business jet she was flying in hit severe turbulence in New England, officials said Monday.
Dana Hyde, 55, of Cabin John, Md., was flying with her husband and one of her sons on an aircraft owned by rural broadband consulting firm Conexon, the company said. Neither of her relatives nor the two members of the flight crew were injured, according to the company and the Federal Aviation Administration.
…
Hyde had a long-standing focus on international development and poverty issues during her years in Washington, including as chief executive of the Millennium Challenge Corporation, an independent U.S. agency that seeks to reduce global poverty
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Film Recommendation:
The House That Jack Built (Lars Von Trier, 2018)
One of L.V.T’s most provocative provocations. Notorious for inspiring both a mass walk-out and a 10 minute standing ovation at Cannes. And honestly, had we been in attendance at Cannes in 2018 (one meant to go, but when one’s favorite silk scarf is at the dry cleaners what is one to do?) we might have walked out too. Because an hour and fifteen minutes into T.H.T.J.B. we were ready to give up and had stopped watching. Not that it’s anything one hasn’t seen in a million other movies before. Just that it was difficult to not feel complicit somehow in Jack’s crimes. Which I suppose is part of the point. Yet curiosity got the better of me and I resumed watching. And I’m glad I did. Matt Dillon gives an uncompromising and courageous performance. His presence in the film allows the safe distance for the viewer. When things get too gnarly, we can remind ourselves, “That’s just Matt Dillon. We like him. He was funny in Something About Mary and sinister in Wild Things. He’s an actor. This is what he does. This isn’t real.”
Right?
Who knows.
Book recommendations
Biowarfare in America, Jim Keith
Remember: the only good conspiracy theorist is a dead conspiracy theorist. Living, successful c.t’s are, consciously or not, on somebody’s payroll.3 So here's the last book written by Keith, and one of the last works published by the late, lamented Illuminet books. Keith of course, injured himself falling off a stage at Burning Man, and then died a perfectly normal explainable death shortly afterwards during knee surgery. Then, the owner of Illuminet, Ron Bonds, died a perfect normal explainable death from e. coli after dinner with his wife at a Mexican Restaurant. His wife didn’t get sick. And there is certainly no information in Biowarfare in America that would be of interest in these post-pandemic, pre-Event times. So, never mind, don’t read it. Go find some red pill dude on youtube who shouts at you about Tartaria instead.
And, finally…
In pre-Communist Tibet a strange story was told about the fifth Dalai Lama. The “Fifth” who died circa 1680, was unique among Dalai Lamas in that he was a libertine, a rake and a notorious womaniser. Until recently the love-songs he wrote were still popular with the common people of Tibet and, in Lhasa, certain houses, where tradition averred that he had held assignations with one or other of his mistresses, were marked with a mysterious red sign and were the subject of furtive and unofficial veneration
The story runs that the Dalai Lama was on one of the upper terraces of his palace. He was being subjected to the reproaches of his advisers who found his sexual immorality little to their taste.
“Yes, it is true that I have women,” he admitted, “but you who find fault with me also have them, and copulation for me is not the same thing as it is for you.”
He then walked to the edge of the terrace and urinated over it. With the force of gravity the stream of urine flowed down from terrace to terrace, finally reaching the base of the palace. Then, miraculously, re-ascended the terraces, approached the Dalai Lama and re-entered the bladder from whence it had come.
Triumphantly he turned to those who had been abusing him. “Unless you can do the same,” he said, “you must realise that my sexual relations are different from yours.4
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Until next time….be seeing you….
A couple of obvious do’s and don’t’s. Do: read and re-read Finnegan’s Wake. Don’t: Give yourself an icepick lobotomy. Your hand will shake too much to make it practically effective….
But if you’re stressed and worried perhaps consider chanting the Green Tara mantra 108 times instead (if you don’t already). “Om tare tuttare ture soha.”
I’ll let you finish this one.
Except us, of course.
from “Sexuality, Magic and Perversion,” by Francis King.